People are like lego blocks. Each person only has a limited number of connections that they can really 
sustain in their lives. A standard piece might have 6 close friendships in its life, but then there are those really long and skinny pieces that can maintain 10, or the short ones that only have space for 2.
Over time, our connections fill up and we simply don’t have room for any more friendships in our lives. When a new person joins our community they find a lot of friendly faces, but they might find it very difficult to make friends. It’s not our fault, all our connections are taken.
The hard fact is that for our Church to grow, newcomers need to make friends, not just find people ‘friendly’. This might require the multiplying of congregations or bible study groups, or even the easing of long-held friendships, to open up our connections to others. This is a painful but necessary process if we are truly intent on sharing the great gospel of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ and growing his Kingdom.
You might not have made a new friend for a while, so this might be a little scary, but start simple and invite them over for lunch – find out what interests them and see where it goes.
Most of all, think about how you can place Jesus at the centre, we’re not a social club – we’re God’s people. Why not offer to pray at the end of an evening meal discussion? Or read the Bible when you meet to catch up? Let’s not limit ourselves to being ‘friendly’, let’s be friends!
Being a welcoming Church is not just about who’s on the roster at the door – it’s about setting a culture of welcoming newcomers, seeking to build them up in Christ and incorporate them into our family. It’s our responsibility – all of us.
Tag: welcoming
Have you ever thought about the impact it makes when someone deliberately makes a decision to come and sit next to you?
Perhaps you can recall that time at the high school dance, where that special someone boldly strode across from the boys (or girls) side of the room to sit with you! Or perhaps you remember the friend who came to sit with you for the bus ride on the way to school. Sitting next to someone is more than just an act of physical proximity.
Where you sit at Church is also very important. Not just for a good view, or to feel comfortable about being in the same spot each week, but for the sake of others. Sitting next to someone lets them know you want to spend time with them and that they are important. It speaks volumes to both a newcomer and a regular at Church when somebody deliberately makes a choice to sit with them. Those of us who come to Church on our own will be especially helped by someone joining us, but at the same time we shouldn’t assume that a family grouping wants their ‘space’ more than our company.
When you arrive at Church each week, why not pray on the way in about who you might be able to sit next to and encourage or welcome. Share with them how you’ve been encouraged by God and his word and ask them how they are going. Of course there are plenty of opportunities to welcome and encourage one another after Church, but who you sit next to is an important decision. Sit with love.
Being a welcoming Church is not just about who’s on the roster at the door – it’s about setting a culture of welcoming newcomers, seeking to build them up in Christ and incorporate them into our family. It’s our responsibility – all of us.
‘Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another–and all the more as you see the Day approaching.’ – Heb 10:25
part 2 of 3
The meerkat is everyone’s favourite at the zoo. After busily foraging around for food (haven’t they noticed that the food mysteriously appears every day at 9am) they stand to attention bolt upright and check this way and that to see that there is no danger at hand. They’re looking out for one another, because they’re a team, because they’re family.
I want to suggest that might be a good habit for us to be in at Church. Not in order to notice any danger, but to notice anyone in danger: anyone who is standing by themselves; anyone looking lost or lonely; or anyone who has come to Church for the first time and will leave again promptly if nobody comes to speak with them.
I completely understand that there is always a friend at Church who you’re itching to catch up with, or to gloat about how you’re team beat their team in the football. But that conversation can wait. When the service finishes, just put that conversation on hold for a second and mimic a meerkat.
I also understand that talking to strangers is scary. Why not be a pair of meerkats? Try it with a friend, say ‘Hey, have you ever seen that person at Church before? Why don’t we go and say hello?’
Mimic a meerkat, and you just might find an opportunity to welcome somebody to our Church, listen to their story, show them around, describe how our ‘King’s Kids’ Sunday school or youth ministries or bible studies work, or even explain the good news of Jesus!
Being a welcoming Church is not just about who’s on the roster at the door – it’s about setting a culture of welcoming newcomers, seeking to build them up in Christ and incorporate them into our family. It’s our responsibility – all of us –and so over the next few weeks in this space, I want to explore this issue.
part 1 of 3…
